Waverly Because I will Pass Out Soon

I had a panic attack shopping for fabric today thanks to Better Homes and Gardens, Martha Stewart, and any other crafty television/and magazine dynasty that have turned everyday people into top designers.

The only problem is, these lovely ladies of design never told me how many options there actually were.

Muslin. Brocade. Silk. Satin. Stripes. Chintz. Embroidery.

I'm sorry... you lost me at muslin.

My mother, aunt, sister, and me were shopping for fabric for curtains and a valence early this afternoon. Upon entering the store this afternoon, my sister and I began to peruse bolts of fabric.

And then we found more fabric.

Then a bit more.

I totally panicked. The beautiful steely blues, sexy rich blacks, and mature golds and reds overtook my sense of sight and almost blinded me. While the reds and golds were the only colors that fit the color scheme of my apartment, I began to picture future color schemes in future houses.

And I panicked some more.

What if my future husband and I couldn't afford nice homemade curtains? What if I had to make them?

I CAN'T SEW!

My typical reaction to too many options when shopping is to wander off. If my sister asks me too many things during grocery shopping, I will wander to another aisle. When my mother and aunt kept asking questions I did the same thing.

AND FOUND MORE FABRIC!

And I found the good fabric too. I love Waverly fabrics. I grew up with them in my home as a child, and now I have the Waverly collection from Target in my room.

We finally picked and bought a fabric three hours after entering, and got enough to make the curtains and the valence (locating enough fabric was even more difficult).

I just thank heavens that I found out now that I need a designer to make choices for me.

Sandra Lee... I am at your beck and call.

(Fabric- Down the Lane: http://www.joann.com/joann/catalog.jsp?CATID=cat953850&PRODID=xprd944009)

Olive Oyl...I think not

...I think grease.

Sweet delicious grease.

Ladies and gentleman I just have to say, "I LOVE that chicken from Popeye's"!

While the Popeye's chicken may not be considered "pop culture" fried chicken certainly is.

"Pop-corn Culture" even (lame I know).

Southern fried chicken has definitely become a part of pop culture, however. I have it on good authority (my source will remain anonymous) that a former American Idol winner (also anonymous) ordered nothing but fried chicken for himself and his cast before a musical.

Seriously.

Just chicken.

I am so glad because I love it. I really do. I gave it up for Lent last year and dropped 20 pounds. The sad thing is though that southern fried chicken now has a racial stigma attached to it.

I heard a lot of jokes after President Obama was elected about everyone getting the "Presidential Special" down at their local Popeye's (sorry KFC lovers. You aren't considered in this at all. I can respect you for loving chicken as much as myself, but ... no thanks).

As a result of these jokes, I also heard a lot of "That's racist and it's not funny."

Well of course it isn't funny. It's sad that a food as heavenly as fried chicken has a racial stigma. I mean when you think about it...shouldn't other races or ethnicities be somewhat jealous?

Fried Chicken is heaven.

And yet, when I once mentioned how much I loved fried chicken in front of a group of people, I was treated as if I were telling a racist joke. I was a bit astonished. It's just chicken isn't it? Had I told them about the American Idol contestant I could have had a fight on my hands.

I am of the impression that when food becomes associated with forms of racism or racist behavior you have a problem.

I discussed this very topic in one of my classes today. We watched an episode of The Office, in which Michael does not understand why he can't tell a joke the same way Chris Rock does.

It was an interesting take on reverse racism. In a sense claiming that he is racist for repeating a joke (he does go over the top later on, but that is a part of the comedic effect) is in itself a racist act.

The fact of the matter is that racial sensitivity should be easier than we (Americans) make it out to be. Can we not simply acknowledge the facts of the past, and rather incorporate the lessons learned into every day life?

I realize solving great problems like these are not nearly this cut-and-dried, and that they will likely never be solved completely.

I snuck off a few days ago to get a snack...and started to feel like I was being judged by a few of the customers in my local Popeye's.

Today I realized what the problem was.

I get it.

Picture : (http://www.cardinalsw.com/Images/popeyes-family.jpg)

A Boyle So Perfect

So today I finally bit the bullet and watched the video of Susan Boyle on Britain's Got Talent the British version of American Idol. I don't watch Idol nor do I keep up with the British version, but the press has made such a fuss over this woman that I had to watch it.

And so I did.

I cried like a baby.

Here is this 47 year old woman, who has never been kissed, and she belts out a beautiful rendition of I Dreamed a Dream from the musical Les Miserables . The woman who "shut up Simon Cowell" seems completely genuine and quite adorable.

So why is one of the questions that Diane Sawyer asks her in an interview whether or not she will get a makeover?

I mean if she wants to...that's fine. But why is it that the media is so superficial?

Oh that's right...

Because we allow them to be.

If anyone wants to know why America's teenagers, young adults, and the economy is going to hell in a hand basket just take a look in the mirror folks. We have gotten out of the habit of appreciating the best things in life. Instead of listening to music about 'bitches and hos' (which I do like, but not all the time) from men and women dressed like sparkly disco balls maybe we should start appreciating a beautiful opera from a beautifully normal human being.

Miss Boyle, please don't change for us. Let us change for you.

Roadhouse Menu: Swayze Beefsteak

Flipping through the channels tonight I stumbled upon Roadhouse. It had been a while since I had seen it so I watched a little bit, and I have to say...damn that man can make a movie.

When I first learned of Swayze's cancer I was pretty upset. I mean it's Patrick Swayze. He is indestructible. It would be like Arnold Schwarzenegger having heart problems.

Oh wait...

But it is hard when an icon that is perceived as being indestructible suddenly becomes mortal. I mean what do you do? How do you cope?

Roadhouse is actually my second favorite movie of Swayze's. Here are my top five fave Swayze films:

1. Black Dog

2. Roadhouse

3. Ghost

4. To Wong Fu: Thanks for Everything, Julie Newmar

5. Dirty Dancing

I decided to google Mr. Swayze while watching the film and I found out that he has an International Fan Club! And they put out a magazine!

As an aspiring writer, the thought of writing about this pop culture icon is...stimulating to say the least. But that's off topic.

Swayze's hot. He always has been. I saw him on a preview of his new show "Beast" and I have to say, the man is still extremely sexy...cancer and all. If anyone can beat the shit out of cancer it's...

1. Jack Crewes

2. Dalton

3. Sam Wheat

4. Vida Boheme

5. Johnny Castle

As Crewes, Swayze is a truck driver battling time bad guys, and the pitt-bull chained to his toilet in the trailer of his rig.

As Dalton...well...you pop culture fans know Dalton means business.

Sam Wheat overcame limbo to save the woman he loved and revenge his murder.

Vida Boheme beat the shit out of Stockard Channing's abusive husband.

And Johnny Castle saved a friend's life, awakened passion in a new dance partner, and just looked damn good without a shirt on.

So when a picture (have no idea if it was doctored) of Swayze showed up in the National Enquirer looking gaunt and emaciated...

I couldn't help but think of the golden haired mullet-god in Roadhouse. Or the inspiring cross-dresser in To Wong Fu...

Suddenly, I'm not so worried.

Pop Culture Cult...

I have decided to give the blog a more definite focus. I love pop culture, so I feel like that is what I should focus on.

When thinking about writing about pop culture, I decided to go ahead and look up the actual definition. I was actually a bit surprised at the answer.

According to Dictionary.com, Pop Culture, or popular culture, is basically patterns of human activity that give shit meaning.

That's it. I was looking for something deeper. But Pop Culture is really just a way of passing the buck when it comes to why people act the way they act...for example why people are SO infatuated with the octomom.

All pop culture boils down to is human nature. We like freaky things, freaky people, and freaky sex.

The focus of this blog will now relate to popular culture (which it kind of did already) and will look closely at how people act and why by analyzing text, videos...you name it.

So let's start talking about it.

In response to kittens...

Well guys (kittens) ... at least I didn't do this...

Click Here

Funny...but I would never do that.

Today's Question

I am currently on Accutane and am experiencing joint pain. It's awful stuff. Anybody have any healthy remedies for making my back feel better?

I Saved A Kitten Today...

...and he or she wrecked my car.

The cute little devil is a stray. I have seen it around the complex before and tried to catch it so I could give it a good home, but alas, it was too quick.

So I watched it dart between cars every now and then wondering where it was from, and where it was going.

So I am going to get in my car this morning, and unbeknownst to me, the little devil is curled up in a tiny little ball under the car.

I get in, and throw my bag on the front seat, and begin to slowly...and cautiously...back out of my parking spot.

Well the cute lil Kit-Kat under my car must have gotten scared (and rightfully so) and darted out from under the moving vehicle, which I happend to see in my rearview. This startled me and my reaction was to jerk the wheel (bad idea if I had been anywhere other than a parking spot)

I clipped the pole of the covered parking spots next to me, and then proceeded to watch as my front bumper smoothly peeled away from the front of my car.

It was almost beautiful...a little poetic even.

Now I could have freaked out, and there was a time in my life when I defenitly would have. But I didn't. The only thing I said was...

"Really?"

So I got up, got my sister, moved the bumper, and drove her car to school. I was proud of myself for not freaking out. I was proud of myself for saving the tiny 'lil' kitten.

But...as sad and selfish I can't help but think...

My car is ugly!

That makes me sad.

Carlton Banks Unplugged

Found this surfing the interweb. Have no idea what it's purpose is, but I'll be danged if it isn't funny.

Twitter Me This...

Does anyone Twitter on the toilet? Or blog? Someone answer my question!!!

Who will be the next American Hero

Move aside "Sully" ... there are some new kids in town.

After Captain Chelsey Sullenberger's amazing landing in the Hudson River this January, America saw something that she hadn't seen in a long time. Positive happy news reports.

CNN, Fox, and every other major television network plastered Sully's goose-driven miracle across front pages and headlines everywhere. He was an instant national hero, and was even present at the coin toss at February's Superbowl. America embraced this grey-headed US Airways captain as a member of the family.

But now he has competition.

This Sunday a miracle occurred. After days of being captive to Somali pirates, and one escape attempt, three U.S. Navy SEAL snipers helped free Captain Richard Phillips of the Maersk Alabama was freed.

Who would reign supreme in a battle of the Captains? Both men have illustrated that they can maintain calm in extremely difficult situations. Both men have lasting power. Could Captain Phillips overtake Sully's status as America's sweetheart?

And then today...something happened...

CNN reported that Doug White of Archibald, Louisiana landed a large "turboprop" plane after the pilot fell unconscious and died . While White had some piloting experience, he had no idea how to use any of the controls in the plane, and with the help of the "Lord" and the air traffic controllers he landed the sucker.

What do we do now America? We have three amazing men to be role models. Three All American heroes to be icons for our sons, daughters, nieces, and nephews!

I do not intend to make light of these situations or these men. But this is a wonderful opportunity for Americans to start focusing on the positive and quit dwelling on the negative gossip that feeds the media.

So let's focus on all three. Let's make these men, and other men and women like them the All-American Justice League! Let's befriend them on Facebook!

Let the hero worship begin...